Erectile Dysfunction (ED) could be a man’s worst nightmare. With erectile dysfunction, there is no erection good enough to consummate the sexual act between a man and a woman. This could be devastating to a man and, psychologically, an issue to a woman.In this condition, masturbation ispossible but the penis could not achieve an erection with which would be good enough for penetration. Masturbation does not cause ED (this is discussed in https://www.issm.info/sexual-health-qa/does-masturbation-cause-erectile-dysfunction-ed/).
This condition can cause problems in a relationship.
Effect on Relationships
Men with erectile dysfunction (undiagnosed) can be very frustrated and this can be very demasculinating to them. Not being able to achieve the expected masculinity which symbolizes their fertility and manlinesson demand is frustrating enough for them. A man is always expected to get a hard on when he is with his woman, in fact erections are common response to as basic as kissing.
Then of course, additional pressure in the environmentbrought about by friends who discuss about their sex lives getting better, pornography that suggests how to make an erection last longer, and of course media sources that talk about longer and better sex pleasures.
Women partners also face issues when their partners have this condition. Check here to know what women think when their mates have erection problems. They begin to worry if they are no longer enough for their husbands or partners. They form scary ideas such as their partners no longer finding them attractive or having an unfair so that she can no longer entice her man to have an erection because his mind is somewhere else or he may be addicted to porn.
There are, however, other reasons why erection fails. Stress and fatigue can also be a reason; problems and other personal worries can also be reasons to such condition. But all these should be temporary only. If erection failure persists, couples should seek professional help as this could be, in fact, erectile dysfunction, and this needs to be handled by the couple to avoid it creating more damage to their relationship. If not sorted out soonest, this can go on for a long time because problem with erection is not an easy topic to discuss between couples. The longer it would take them to sort out things, the wider the gap would become.
What to do?
The more couples would know about ED the more they will find it easier to handle and adjust.
Seek medical attention
First things first, visit your doctor and find out the cause to the condition so it can be addressed. If there is a medical condition relative to the ED, then you will have to discuss further with the doctor. Once you have cleared out the diagnosis, finding out what the condition is all about and how to handle it in order for it not to affect your relationship.
Do not take it personally
Women must not take it personally. The failure of erection is nothing to do with them. It is not because their male partners have lost interest on them, or cheating on them, or addicted to porn. It is simply not able to sustain an erection. But remember that sex does not always need an erection. Men who suffer from this condition would often withdraw from being sexual with their partners. They develop anxiety and some go into depression. When this happens, women should not take as their partners leaving them off but it is because men with ED are embarrassed of their situations. Most often they do not tell their partners about it, they would just avoid being sexual with them.
An open communication is necessary
The lack of sex in a relationship may probably cause a problem in the relationship but the lack of communication ruins it with or without sex happening. https://www.thelyfemagazine.com/7-effects-poor-communication/ discusses the effects of poor communication in a relationship and most often this ends up with the relationship ruined.
Especially when the male partner is suffering from ED, an open communication line between couples is very important. It is important that couples talk about the situation, although talking can be awkward to the male partner, but both has to adjust in order to sort things out and avoid a negative impact on the relationship.
ED can be very detrimental to the confidence of the male partner; he may even think that he no longer has any value in the relationship. When this happens he might withdraw from intimacy leaving the relationship to deteriorate. It is then important that couples with ED must not forget the value of communication because this is what will help them through and keep you strong.
Be sensitive and careful when talking about it.
It is not anybody’s fault so it is important that the women are supportive of their partners with ED. They already have enough pressure and frustration just by having it so there is no need to add to that pressure as it will not do the relationship any good. Just remember that ED isnot anyone’s fault. If your partner suffers from ED, remain as supportive as possible and do not put pressure on them.Click here to get tips on how to talk with a partner with ED.
Change your concept about sex
Penetration is not the only way to achieve orgasm; there are several other ways of achieving sexual pleasure than just penetration. So this means couples with ED should not let the condition affect the intimacy between them. Stroking and touching each other will make a big difference.
Aside from considering other ways of achieving orgasm without the erection, couples can also consider some known medicines that can induce an erection and sustain it for a long time. However, it is best that doctors are consulted first prior to experimenting with which medicine would suit best your needs.
Erectile dysfunction allows for couples to explore the other body parts and find other pleasure places in the body. Relax and enjoy the other body parts. The penis is not everything; climax and orgasm can be achieved without its participation. Have sex in different ways, in different rooms, in different places. Focus on your closeness and intimacy, not on the want to penetrate. Penetration is just one way of achieving sexual pleasure, but actually there are many other ways to do it. You just have to explore and try.
There are many organizationsthat can help with the struggles of couples with ED. Sex therapists who are trained and understand the dynamics of sex in a relationship can help couples manage it so that they can adjust themselves, their sexual activities and expectations. In this manner, the presence of ED will not be devastating to the relationship.